Procrastination Project: Week 1

It has been a couple of weeks since I’ve been tracking my hours. This month has not been easy as I’ve endured minor concussion and had the flu in consecutive weeks. This may sound like excuses but my body was burnt out and I could not think much else. Mind you, I still managed to get stuck in the YouTube hole and watched Netflix for the whole day I was sick reminding myself that I was ‘resting’. However, after binging on the screen for a whole day, I realized I felt like CRAP the next day. I did not feel rested at all and my head actually felt cloudy if that makes any sense.

Anyways working on my motivation and procrastination hasn’t been a good start but the good thing is that I did not totally give up! Hey, I will take small wins anytime, any day!

This is my first week of tracking my hours and I realized I am quite busy during the weekdays and underestimate how much time I spend on each activity. I go to work and go to the gym and thought nothing of it but going to the gym actually took a long time. I work out for two hours twice a week so me believing that I had time to do other things afterward was me being overly ambitious. No wonder I could not find the energy afterward and I blamed myself for lack of motivation and ambitions. My body’s energy was depleted to the core and all I wanted was to eat and rest! BUT accepting this sort of lifestyle would be way too easy. I still want to push myself like right now! 

I will see how I do.

Please let me know if you are going something similar and if you overcome procrastination!

Thank you for reading!

Until then


Minimalist Min(ie)

Photo by Karim MANJRA on Unsplash

I Need Help! (Procrastination)

I am a huge procrastinator. The scariest thing is that I did not even realize it until I was in my 30’s. In my 20’s I had this mantra that said: “Let it be…”. I will just live life the way it comes to me. 

In my late 20’s when I came into the social services field, I learned how to be self-aware and to think critically of what I wanted in life and I realized it wasn’t the way I was living.

When I went back to school I quit my then job (I was venting about work as my major stressor in life) which I loathed and dived into this new field. 

Right now, I want much more…not materialistic wise but skills-wise and just to feel excited and passionate again. I am reading Tim Ferriss’ “4 – Hour Workweek” and he said the opposite of sadness was not happiness but to feel the excitement

This is how I feel when I blog or to make YouTube videos where I can communicate with people all over the world. For those of us privileged folks who have internet, I am very thankful for that.

I’ve made YouTube videos around 4 years ago and I had fun doing so but stopped because I wasn’t getting enough traction and realized there was actual work involved (ha, who knew)! 

Now, I want to start writing (more consistently) and filming again. In the past there were mostly about haul videos and makeup tips but now I want to share more about the areas I want to improve such as skills, life goals, finance, minimalist living (hence my name), sustainability, eco-living, etc.) to share and to learn from others as I go.

Again, there are a TON OF INFORMATION about how to do well in all these areas all over the internet but for me, they can be overwhelming and sometimes misleading. For me, CONNECTION is very important and I mean TRUE connection, so this might be hard for me.

I don’t often go on my friends’ Instagrams or communicate through their social media platforms because I think I will text them if I want to connect with them. If not, can we call ourselves friends?! We are probably acquaintances if I only like your page and comment “Looks so fun!”. Am I the only one who feels this way?

I want to work on my procrastination and to figure out what I want in life, but I need help and I will admit it. I often feel lost and I will admit it. I don’t want to be in my 40’s and be lost like this (who am I kidding, I will still probably feel this way!!!!) I can still be lost but hopefully at another level…if that makes sense.

I recently met a co-worker who’s driven, positive and best of all ORGANIZED and oh boy…these are the traits I wished I had. I will try to get some advice from her so I can get something done. Mind you, these are the tips that are probably spread out all over the internet so nothing new here but it’s different when I will be working and talking about these issues face to face with someone.

First thing first.

She told me to track where my time was going. I read this sort of thing online but did not want to do it because that meant I had to face the reality that I am always…PROSCRASTINATING…..and my nemesis… Netflix!!!!!!

I really want to work on my procrastination and want to share with all of you who’s working on theirs. Why do I want to share? Well…I want to continue to write and also to keep myself accountable.

Is anybody else going through procrastination and working on them? If it worked how did it work? Please share as I am pretty desperate!

As always thank you for reading!

Until then,

Minimalist Min(nie)

Photo by Pedro da Silva on Unsplash

Yearning for something…

Vacations are like a dream. It seemed like it happened but you aren’t so sure. 

It’s hard to face reality when you come back from vacation. 

I just came back from a vacation where I was able to explore the outdoors, family relationships and relaxation all in one. 

I felt very lucky that I was able to go on this vacation yet I feel sad now that I returned. 

I also felt scared of coming back to face reality. I realized life was happening too fast, too routine and too mundane. Even though the things I did in my everyday life was what I enjoyed… Or Did I? 

I am not so sure anymore. I feel scared about going back to my go go go life. I am scared to feel trapped and to be stuck. I want to explore and experience the world. To experience new things.. Things that interest me.. To be around interesting people… But for me to do that.. I also need to have the skills.. I either need a job that I can do offshore or do remotely. 

I really do like my current job which is working in the social services field but I also need something that will quench my thirst to experience. That is what ignites me and fuels me. The reason why I cannot give up making videos and writing is to create new experiences and to learn while I hopefully progress.

What are you doing to quench your thirst to live the life you want to live?

Until then


Minimalist Min(nie)

Wanting peace…

Sometimes I just don’t want to get out of bed. 

 

The heavy blankets cover me like a protective cocoon. 

 

I think about how I relish sleep and how I don’t want to get out of it. I wonder if this is how ‘peaceful’ death feels like. 

 

Sometimes I think about death and more as I get older. When I thought of death when I was younger like in high school it terrified me. I couldn’t believe once I died there wouldn’t be me. I will not exist! Yes, there could be a higher power and who knows what roads there will be once I leave earth but that is when I leave earth! 

 

I am not suicidal but sometimes I can imagine the peace it may bring especially with all the commotion with the world and just the rat race that a lot of us live in. 

 

We go to work, eat, sleep and repeat and the times just fly by with a blink of an eye. 

 

I realize life is precious and how mindfulness and taking everything at the moment is so important and precious. 

 

Every day I am trying to find if what I am doing right and what I love. 

 

I do enjoy my work but it is from 9 to 5 and I have similar routines every day every week and every month. 

 

I did not say every year because I want to change up my routine next year and add something different to my life. I hear and read people suddenly get up, quit their job and do something totally different. I am inkling to do that but I am also scared of what ifs. Negativity. Darkness. Fearful. Loser. 

 

Oh, those damn old habits. We are humans of comforts aren’t we but I want to shuffle that a bit. 

 

Whatever you feel stuck on you can change something. Just try little by a little bit. I know I will constantly try or at least be aware of it. 

 

Again, I am not condoning suicides and life is precious. There was a quote from the movie “Wrinkle in Time” that made me think about how special and unique we all are.  

 

Mrs Which: [ to Meg]“Do you realize how many events, choices, that had to occur since the birth of the universe leading up to the making of you?  Just exactly the way you are.”

 

https://www.awortheyread.com/wrinkle-in-time-quotes/

 

Thank you for reading my rambles and hope you have a great day. 

 

If you know anyone who is thinking of suicide, please contact 1833-456-4566 or text at 45645 between 4pm -12am ET in Canada.

 

Until then

 

 

Minimalist Min(nie)

I Just Want to Give up…

I just want to give up…

I haven’t blogged for 3 months!!! Well I was taking a class so I had to concentrate most of my time and energy for that but I don’t want this to be an excuse!!! Because I plan to take more courses and I want to continue to blog and You Tube etc..

Sometimes I feel like I am such a failure and I suck and I should just give up!!!

But why aren’t I???

There is something about blogging that I just can’t give up…

…and that is connection.

I long to connect and not just any connection but REAL connection. What is real? I don’t know how to explain but I feel it in my bones, my heart and my everything…

I think that’s why I continue to blog because I want to find other people that is going through something similar as me.

Mind you, I have friends, partner, family and even our pet, Kyuuko!

But connection just doesn’t stop there..I am yearning to learn from others and to provide service to others.

One obstacle to this journey is that I am an INTROVERT!!! I get overwhelmed with too many likes (even 5 likes overwhelm me), too many people, too much everything!

Oh and I am also not organized and not disciplined…so all the formula add to NOTHING!!

I am feeling like…

I do not know enough

I am not passionate enough

I am scared what others will think of me

I do not know how I will react with confrontations or bullies (or cyber bullying)

I am not good enough

I am not pretty enough

I am not young enough

I am not mature enough

I do not have time

etc…

One thing I do know is I want to continue to learn, and to meet people who inspire me and whom I can connect with…I YEARN FOR CONNECTION!!!

But…

I don’t like forcing myself…because I don’t think it’s authentic enough….weird, I know…

I am stuck now but I will come up with something.

Thanks for reading as always…

Until then,

Minimalist Min(ie)

 

 

 

 

My Take on Consuming Less…

I’ve decided to consume less. It started back in December of 2017 that I started listening to podcasts and meditation and I am not sure if it was the culmination of all of that but I decided to start to consume less.

 

I’ve also stopped eating meat and dairy products. The reasons were for health, environment and animal issues. This process lasted for 6 months and it was a profound experience. In the beginning, I felt lethargic and had no energy because I was eating a lot of carbs so I did not necessarily felt at best. However, it did make me notice how much meat products that were snuck in all sorts of processed products.

 

Now, I do eat meat and dairy products here and there but definitely less than before. I now try to eat meat-less options whenever I can and the reason why I started eating meat and dairy products were because I just did not want to restrict myself. For myself, restriction comes back with a vengeance so I did not want it to consume me. I wanted to remind myself that I can be in control and to be mindful when I am consuming certain types of food.

 

For consuming less, I’ve started with buying fewer clothes. When ‘Haul Videos” came out on YouTube, I was fascinated. I’ve been curious about how others lived so when haul videos came out I was blown over! So mesmerized that I went ahead to make my own haul videos.

 

I could not afford much so I was only able to buy clothes from fast fashion retailers. The videos did not gain much attraction, but I had fun doing it. I did that for two years and my wallet started to ache. Even though the individual clothes were priced relatively cheap, the final amount was not. I would spend hundreds of dollars per month on clothes and accessories -all in the name of making haul videos.

 

I realized my wallet was hurting and my closet was bursting with clothes that I did not care much about. Again in December of 2017, I completely stopped buying clothes for 5 months and I felt free and more in control of my life. I’ve started reading books such as Power of less, Slow Living and The Minimalist Home by bloggers and authors that promoted minimalism living. I wanted to devoid of physical and mental clutter and to live simply as possible.

 

I caved when I went to Portland with my family for a weekend trip which has sort of been a tradition where we would check out the restaurants, and shop at the outlet malls during the May long weekend. However, when I went to outlet malls this time where all the window displays screamed SALES, I was much more mindful of what I was buying and I only ended up buying a couple of gym wear clothing.

 

Because of this whole consuming less experience, I am much more appreciative of what I already have and tend to have more joy which reminds me of the author Marie Kondo. I am finally understanding what she meant to keep what makes you have joy and happiness and I am thankful for this experience.

 

I also want to point out that I adopted this approach because I’ve experienced having too much stuff and feeling suffocated and unfulfillment with all the materials I had. I acknowledge that I am at a privileged state where I had the option to buy more or less.

 

I think too much of anything does not work for me. I can only do what works for me which is not to go into one extreme end. With minimalism, I can only take what works for me and nothing else.

 

Have you tried different types of lifestyle approach and found something that clicked with you? Please share and leave a comment down below.

 

Thank you for reading!

 

Until then,

 

 

Minimalist Min(ie)

 

Photo by Narain Jashanmal on Unsplash

3 Reasons Why I Will Never Be a Famous Blogger

  1. In general, I despise social media. I cannot keep up with the current trends, and I do not have the time to scroll and like all of their pages even though I may want to. When people like my pages I actually want to go to everyone’s pages and check them out; however, that tires and overwhelms me. I do not get a ton of likes but even checking out five people stresses me out. I have not used Facebook for almost 10 years!! I realized on average I would spend four hours a day just scrolling meaningless pages of people I hardly cared or talked to!! I still have an account in case I need to connect with someone but I have not so far. For Instagram, I only post pictures while travelling and for Twitter, I only check once in a while but even then. And what is Snapchat? 

2. I hate waiting in lines when checking out ‘it’ places. For example, restaurants or just opened restaurants or ‘it’ places for that matter, I think lining up is a huge waste of time and frankly I do not freaken care. I admit I do not have a sophisticated taste when it comes to food so for me it can be a waste of money and time. Also, I have a poor memory so I honestly do not remember how the food tasted like unless they were exceptional? 😦

3. Not consistent in my writing game. I write when I ‘feel’ like it or ‘inspired’ by it or ‘motivated’. Yup. This means I NEVER write! The fact that I am writing now amazes me.

 

I do want to end this post with a positive note. My goal is not to be famous but to connect with people who think similar thoughts but also who are not like me! I do not want to surround myself who only thinks like me because I want to understand how other people think and also to be critical of the issues that surround me. 

I do want to continue to write and to hone my craft so I will continue to read and to write and to share my thoughts with others.

 

If you are a famous blogger, how do you feel different compared to when you were less famous? If you are a less famous blogger, how are you stepping up on your blogging?

 

Thank you for reading!

 

Until then,

Minimalist Min(ie)

 

 

 

Photo by Anthony Tran on Unsplash